Book Review: Simplicity Parenting
Time for another, this time short (hopefully) book review.
I finished it already like a week ago, but haven't had much time. So, this time - Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne.
This is a really famous parenting book - at least in the groups, where I spend my time, it is always the one suggested (next to some couple of others). And, now I can say - for a reason.
Everything in this book goes together with the Waldorf philosophy, but you don't have to be into Waldorf, to appreciate the Simplicity Parenting. It's like - you can't do Waldorf without the Simplicity, but you can do Simplicity without Waldorf. And actually.. It's just a perfect match for me, because - I agree with everything (pretty much) in this book, this is how I would like to parent, and this is what I have liked in Waldorf.
The book is (finally) really nicely written - smart, full of information (not repeating all the time, like some American bestsellers are..), nice humor in it, and good amount of research mentioned to back it up.
I think everyone, seriously everyone (at least every parent) should definitely read this book. Even if you don't read any other, this is the one.
Sadly though, people, who exactly would need it the most, probably will not.
So, but shortly - why simplicity?
Truth is, nowadays lives (in America and other developed parts of the world for decades already, here - starting about now) for children are way too overwhelming - as he writes - we have lives of too much - too much stuff, too many choices and too much information.
As adults we can deal with it (sometimes not very well), but children.. They suffer. Some will cope, they don't have much choice, but many won't - resulting in behavior problems, problems at home, family relationships, at school, perhaps even coming out as the modern diagnoses of hyperactivity and attention disorders and so on.
As the author writes, he has observed, that many children from seemingly normal lives actually suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.
And simplifying our lives - especially lives for our children - is the answer.
He describes in detail and how-to practically do it, to simplify our lives, for the sake of happiness and well-being of our children.
Well, actually - for the most part I already knew all these principles: children should have less (really, a lot less) toys and stuff, their lives should not be cluttered (as well as our lives), and also less choices - it deepens their concentration, motivation and creativity; children need rhythm and predictability to feel safe and secure; children's lives should not be over-scheduled with events and activities, they need free (totally free) time, free play and even time to be bored, boredom is essential for them developing their own personalities; and children need less information - they don't need to receive all the information that we, adults do, we need to protect them from that, in a big way we can protect them by not exposing them to TV watching and other screens, especially when they are too young.
I knew all that, and we actually already follow all of these principles in our lives. Somehow, thankfully, this is the way that we have grown up (maybe Soviet did something good - sometimes it's good to be more poor than rich, I mean - we weren't poor, maybe, but we certainly didn't have much in a material way, we didn't have, what children have now - and as a result, we had perfectly simple and, as I have written previously, Waldorfy lives and happy childhoods). Also, people are very different, some, even who grew up the same way, are still people of high energy, leading very busy and active lives. Which is great for them, but they might need to slow down for their children.
We.. As a family.. Well, we are very calm. ;) Sometimes I'd say - lazy. Or not. But we definitely need and like our quiet time, our together time, our resting time. So our lives are pretty simple already. But we are trying to observe it even more, since we have Adelaide - in keeping the rhythm, for example, and not exposing her to TV or screens.
But even with all that, our lives already fitting with the principles of this book, it was still great to read it! Just - to remind, to reassure, to understand the importance of all this.
Of course, right now it's still easy.. It will be harder, once we have teenagers at home and so on, but even then it's possible. And the result should be - a happy, calm, connected family and healthy, secure individuals. :)
I finished it already like a week ago, but haven't had much time. So, this time - Simplicity Parenting by Kim John Payne.
This is a really famous parenting book - at least in the groups, where I spend my time, it is always the one suggested (next to some couple of others). And, now I can say - for a reason.
Everything in this book goes together with the Waldorf philosophy, but you don't have to be into Waldorf, to appreciate the Simplicity Parenting. It's like - you can't do Waldorf without the Simplicity, but you can do Simplicity without Waldorf. And actually.. It's just a perfect match for me, because - I agree with everything (pretty much) in this book, this is how I would like to parent, and this is what I have liked in Waldorf.
The book is (finally) really nicely written - smart, full of information (not repeating all the time, like some American bestsellers are..), nice humor in it, and good amount of research mentioned to back it up.
I think everyone, seriously everyone (at least every parent) should definitely read this book. Even if you don't read any other, this is the one.
Sadly though, people, who exactly would need it the most, probably will not.
So, but shortly - why simplicity?
Truth is, nowadays lives (in America and other developed parts of the world for decades already, here - starting about now) for children are way too overwhelming - as he writes - we have lives of too much - too much stuff, too many choices and too much information.
As adults we can deal with it (sometimes not very well), but children.. They suffer. Some will cope, they don't have much choice, but many won't - resulting in behavior problems, problems at home, family relationships, at school, perhaps even coming out as the modern diagnoses of hyperactivity and attention disorders and so on.
As the author writes, he has observed, that many children from seemingly normal lives actually suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder.
And simplifying our lives - especially lives for our children - is the answer.
He describes in detail and how-to practically do it, to simplify our lives, for the sake of happiness and well-being of our children.
Well, actually - for the most part I already knew all these principles: children should have less (really, a lot less) toys and stuff, their lives should not be cluttered (as well as our lives), and also less choices - it deepens their concentration, motivation and creativity; children need rhythm and predictability to feel safe and secure; children's lives should not be over-scheduled with events and activities, they need free (totally free) time, free play and even time to be bored, boredom is essential for them developing their own personalities; and children need less information - they don't need to receive all the information that we, adults do, we need to protect them from that, in a big way we can protect them by not exposing them to TV watching and other screens, especially when they are too young.
I knew all that, and we actually already follow all of these principles in our lives. Somehow, thankfully, this is the way that we have grown up (maybe Soviet did something good - sometimes it's good to be more poor than rich, I mean - we weren't poor, maybe, but we certainly didn't have much in a material way, we didn't have, what children have now - and as a result, we had perfectly simple and, as I have written previously, Waldorfy lives and happy childhoods). Also, people are very different, some, even who grew up the same way, are still people of high energy, leading very busy and active lives. Which is great for them, but they might need to slow down for their children.
We.. As a family.. Well, we are very calm. ;) Sometimes I'd say - lazy. Or not. But we definitely need and like our quiet time, our together time, our resting time. So our lives are pretty simple already. But we are trying to observe it even more, since we have Adelaide - in keeping the rhythm, for example, and not exposing her to TV or screens.
But even with all that, our lives already fitting with the principles of this book, it was still great to read it! Just - to remind, to reassure, to understand the importance of all this.
Of course, right now it's still easy.. It will be harder, once we have teenagers at home and so on, but even then it's possible. And the result should be - a happy, calm, connected family and healthy, secure individuals. :)
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