Babywearing and Montessori
Recently I had an interesting experience in one Montessori FB group (not in Montessori 101, that group is pleasantly open-minded), in short - people there seemed to think, that babywearing (and co-sleeping, and who knows, what else) is NOT Montessori. As in Montessori you're supposed to encourage child's (even newborn's!) independence, respect them as an individual human being.. But what people don't understand, is that babywearing AND co-sleeping (and extended breastfeeding etc) is doing just that. People have prejudice about Attachment parenting, even though Attachment parenting has scientific base, based on actual needs of newborns. And Attachment parenting promotes independence as well, only - understanding, that babies are dependent in the beginning, and only responding to those dependence needs leads to true (and healthy) independence.
Of course, not everyone has to babywear nor co-sleep, I honestly think everyone is free to do as they find best for their family, only if the baby is not being left to cry, cry-it-out I am utterly and totally against, but well.. Soon, hopefully, everyone will get it, as all the scientific research shows, how harmful it is.
Anyway, but for us - co-sleeping and babywearing all the way! ;) I seriously can't imagine it any other way. It's simply so natural.
And, it is NOT not Montessori, by the way. Maria Montessori was anyway a scientist, and there's no doubt, that with today's research about newborns and safe attachment she would be all for these practices. And even though she lived a century ago (imagine, babywearing and co-sleeping in the modern Western world then?!), she already was so enlightened to see it's positives, here are some quotes from The Absorbent Mind:
Let us think, for a moment, of the many peoples of the world who live at different cultural levels from our own. In the matter of child rearing, almost all of these seem to be more enlightened than ourselves – with all our Western ultramodern ideals. Nowhere else, in fact, do we find children treated in a fashion so opposed to their natural needs. In almost all countries, the baby accompanies his mother wherever she goes. Mother and child are inseparable . . . . And this lasts for the whole period of maternal feeding, which is the reason for this close alliance. For the mother has to feed her child, and therefore she cannot leave him at home when she goes out. To this need for food is added their mutual fondness and love . . . . Mother and child are one.
Except where civilization has broken down this custom, no mother ever entrusts her child to someone else. The child shares the mother’s life and is always listening.
All the great human groups, nations and races, have their individual differences; for example, they have different ways of carrying the baby . . . . In most parts of the world, mothers put the baby on a small bed, or in a large bag; they do not carry him in their arms . . . . Some hang the child from their necks, others tie him to their backs, and others again put him in a small basket; but in all countries mothers have found a way of taking their children about with them.
One observes, too, that the little one, going about with his mother, never cries unless he is ill or hurt in some way. Sometimes he may fall asleep, but he does not cry.
Yet the crying of children is a problem in Western countries. How often do we hear parents complain of their children’s incessant crying? They discuss what to do to quieten the baby, and how to keep him happy.
Isn't this the cutest? :D Adelaide loves taking care of her baby now.. And even tried to babywear.
I have been using my blue Ellevill wrap so far, it's nice and soft for a newborn.. However, I don't know.. Sometimes I still get tired. (Jasmiina is growing so fast, she feels so heavy already!) And I decided to try my Yaro wrap with linen, and it really was more supporting.. Must say, I liked it a lot.
Of course, babies also need chance of a free movement and exploration, but only if they are happy like that! For now, Jasmiina is happy like this for very short moments, lets say - under 5 minutes! (Exactly same as Adelaide was..) And it is completely normal! That's why it's called the 4th trimester - babies are not really ready for the outside world - they need closeness and comfort of the mother's womb. But these moments of independence will increase, they already have, and after a couple of months it will be a different story. What's important - to not stress, what the baby should be doing, but calmly listen to your own child and follow their individual needs.
(This bee I made myself already for Adelaide.. Works perfectly.)
And here I found a creative use for some of Adelaide's stickers! :D Jasmiina was always staring to this white wall, while being changed, and now she has something to look at, and she actually liked it. Adelaide did too. ;)
Of course, not everyone has to babywear nor co-sleep, I honestly think everyone is free to do as they find best for their family, only if the baby is not being left to cry, cry-it-out I am utterly and totally against, but well.. Soon, hopefully, everyone will get it, as all the scientific research shows, how harmful it is.
Anyway, but for us - co-sleeping and babywearing all the way! ;) I seriously can't imagine it any other way. It's simply so natural.
And, it is NOT not Montessori, by the way. Maria Montessori was anyway a scientist, and there's no doubt, that with today's research about newborns and safe attachment she would be all for these practices. And even though she lived a century ago (imagine, babywearing and co-sleeping in the modern Western world then?!), she already was so enlightened to see it's positives, here are some quotes from The Absorbent Mind:
Let us think, for a moment, of the many peoples of the world who live at different cultural levels from our own. In the matter of child rearing, almost all of these seem to be more enlightened than ourselves – with all our Western ultramodern ideals. Nowhere else, in fact, do we find children treated in a fashion so opposed to their natural needs. In almost all countries, the baby accompanies his mother wherever she goes. Mother and child are inseparable . . . . And this lasts for the whole period of maternal feeding, which is the reason for this close alliance. For the mother has to feed her child, and therefore she cannot leave him at home when she goes out. To this need for food is added their mutual fondness and love . . . . Mother and child are one.
Except where civilization has broken down this custom, no mother ever entrusts her child to someone else. The child shares the mother’s life and is always listening.
One observes, too, that the little one, going about with his mother, never cries unless he is ill or hurt in some way. Sometimes he may fall asleep, but he does not cry.
Yet the crying of children is a problem in Western countries. How often do we hear parents complain of their children’s incessant crying? They discuss what to do to quieten the baby, and how to keep him happy.
I have been using my blue Ellevill wrap so far, it's nice and soft for a newborn.. However, I don't know.. Sometimes I still get tired. (Jasmiina is growing so fast, she feels so heavy already!) And I decided to try my Yaro wrap with linen, and it really was more supporting.. Must say, I liked it a lot.
Of course, babies also need chance of a free movement and exploration, but only if they are happy like that! For now, Jasmiina is happy like this for very short moments, lets say - under 5 minutes! (Exactly same as Adelaide was..) And it is completely normal! That's why it's called the 4th trimester - babies are not really ready for the outside world - they need closeness and comfort of the mother's womb. But these moments of independence will increase, they already have, and after a couple of months it will be a different story. What's important - to not stress, what the baby should be doing, but calmly listen to your own child and follow their individual needs.
(This bee I made myself already for Adelaide.. Works perfectly.)
And here I found a creative use for some of Adelaide's stickers! :D Jasmiina was always staring to this white wall, while being changed, and now she has something to look at, and she actually liked it. Adelaide did too. ;)
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